How will they ever understand our plight?

I’ve been asked why I write this blog by some random plebs on this here “internet.” The short answer is that I wish to add some balance to the communist dystopias that seem to form these internets. Everywhere I look, from the New York Times website to the MSNBC website, all I see is class warfare and propaganda about the poor. Nowhere is the plight of the rich and elite actually documented and explained. If no one writes about it, how will the poor understand our suffering?

Unfortunately, due to the incompetence of one of my servants from yesterday — a servant who was duly and promptly sacked — I was unable to put an entry on this blog-maker thing. Thus, the web fell out of balance once again with the elite being left in the gutter of these tubes. Now what did he do, exactly? Well, in the process of cleaning my office, this plebian decided that my highly prepared notes for the entry should be thrown out because they just happened to fall into the wastebasket by mistake. He should have been smart enough to realize that everything within the wastebasket needs to be properly vetted before being disposed of when such is the case, and never to be touched at any other time.  How dare they think to rifle through my documents?!

I am certain he did this on purpose out of some class warfare vendetta against us elite, and our desire to get out the message of our plight. Well, not anymore. I told that socialist to pack his bags and get out and I’m certain he will never work again in this state. Especially after I gave a call to the INS.

I see this blog as the one last bastion of truth about the plight of the rich. Even McCain and the Republicans have forgotten how difficult the lives of the rich and privileged are. How much suffering we go through at the hands of the ungrateful plebs in order to grant the luxuries that the people of this great country receive.

Big speech tonight from Obama, I am going to probably need an extra bottle of cognac to even sit through that one.