It’s time for a Republican insurgency

Finally, the Republicans realize what dire straits we elite are in:

“Insurgency, we understand perhaps a little bit more because of the Taliban,” Sessions said during a meeting yesterday with Hotline editors. “And that is that they went about systematically understanding how to disrupt and change a person’s entire processes. And these Taliban — I’m not trying to say the Republican Party is the Taliban. No, that’s not what we’re saying. I’m saying an example of how you go about [sic] is to change a person from their messaging to their operations to their frontline message. And we need to understand that insurgency may be required when the other side, the House leadership, does not follow the same commands, which we entered the game with.”

Exactly!  Things are so dire in this country, that we need to take a page from the Taliban and re-establish the rightful ruling class. However, unlike the Taliban, the Republican insurgency won’t be to put religious nutzoids into power like they did in Iraqistan (which we promptly bombed out), but rather to put us, the proper elite, into the god-given positions we are supposed to be in. So the Republicans should implement a policy of insurgency in order to ensure that those who should be in power are in power.

What does this mean?  They need absorb the mindset of a proper Taliban insurgency and then implement it to ensure that the godless, communist Democrats don’t make matters worse in this country by giving my money to the plebs.

“I think insurgency is a mindset and an attitude that we’re going to have to search for and find ways to get our message out and to be prepared to see things for what they are, rather than trying to do something about them,” Sessions said. “I think what’s happened is that the line was drawn in the sand” by Pelosi.

They aren’t taking on the tactics of the Taliban lightly. This has all come to pass because Pelosi and those dirty Communists Democrats fooled so many plebians in the last election into voting for them. Due to that clear violation of our democracy, it is vital that Sessions and other Republican leaders do all that they can to ensure that the Democrats don’t pry more of the power away from the elite to give to the plebian masses of this nation.

For you see, if the plebian poor gain power and influence, then we are all doomed. They are poor for a reason: they aren’t supposed to have power. If they gain power over us elite, then nothing will get done, and gears of our society will grind to a halt. Remember, it is we, the elite few, who provide the money and intelligence needed to move this economy.

The Taliban fought the communists in Iraqistan and the Republicans will fight them here. The mistake the Taliban made, and the reason we had to go in there and impose a proper democracy on them, is that they placed religious nuts as their leaders. If our Republican insurgency works, we’ll impose the proper elite of the society into the positions of power — People like Bush or Cheney or McCain.

If we fail, however, it’s time for the elite to move to greener pastures.